Friday, May 29, 2009

we're from the country and we like it that way (even if others don't)

Alberta, rural Alberta in particular, gets a pretty bad rap a lot of the time. Alberta: home to gun-totin', tory-votin', Jesus-lovin' rednecks.

Which isn't to say that we haven't earned the reputation - Albertans have a bad habit of acting a little ... back-woodsy, shall we say, when the world is looking. But it's become habit for the rest of Canada, when the heat is on, to turn and say "at least we're not Alberta."

In Alberta, of course, this has turned into something different; "Blame Alberta" has turned into "Blame the Rural-folk."

The rural areas, some would have you believe, are filled with inbred, cross-burning, bible-thumping, Conservative-loving, ignorant, ill-educated, seldom-washed, gap-toothed hicks. All rural people drive huge, polluting trucks with a gun-rack in the back, believe the earth to be 6000 years old and flat, and wait for the local preacher to tell them how to vote. Rural evenings are spent at bush-parties, book-burnings, and tent-meetings.

All evils can be directly related to the population of rural Alberta: homelessness is the result of country-folks right-wing attitudes; numerous Conservative majorities the result of rural ignorance; private health care the brain-child of greedy country-dwellers.

Rural areas are devoid of culture, the people illiterate, the towns and villages suspicious of outsiders.

When spending time in one of Alberta's urban centres, rural people must make a decision: completely renounce one's roots, or face ostracism by enlightened city-dwellers.

Reasonable people realize what a load of horse-turds statements like these are, but reasonable people can be hard to find in a pinch.

There certainly are many people in this neck-of-the-woods who do fit the stereotype, but many more live in the shining cities and all across Canada. Are we to believe that there are fewer Conservatives in Calgary and Edmonton than in the rest of the province? Can it possibly be true that there are fewer Creationists in the cities than out of them? Am I to believe that urban centres are not plagued by racism and prejudice?

When I was in university I spent an awful lot of breath defending my rural background and the baggage that comes with it. Many felt I must be relieved to have escaped the ignorant country-side. When I returned to the farm I suspect more than a couple of my friends questioned my actions: I suspect they're still waiting for me to come crawling back to the city.

The issue goes beyond personal annoyance, however. It seems that nine times out of ten the people who denounce the rural areas loudest are staunch supporters of Alberta's non-right parties. What rural Albertan would vote for someone who holds them in disdain? The Conservatives, for all thier faults, know that rural voters hold the balance of power and to win you need to court that vote.

Be ye warned, people of the left, change will not come without the rural vote.

Thus, dear reader, I complete my post. Regards from Alberta's brush plain.

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